


This Never Happened

by enchantingmoon (sunnywithclouds)



Category: vistlip
Genre: A bit of drama, Happily Ever After, Hurt feelings, M/M, Misunderstandings, Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-20
Updated: 2019-08-20
Packaged: 2020-09-19 08:48:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20328388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunnywithclouds/pseuds/enchantingmoon
Summary: Originally posted to LJ as “enchantingmoon” in 2010.  All chapters here in one spot:“He wasn't being mean. Tomo wasn't trying to be a jerk. He was trying to make it easy for them.It was a moment of weakness brought on by too much to drink and a shared cab ride home.Yuh was supposed to get out on his own but he stumbled two steps towards his building, prompting Tomo to laugh and get out after him.”———————-





	This Never Happened

"This never happened." Tomo said, still out of breath, still buried inside the man under him.

Their eyes met, but only briefly before Tomo's flicked away. He turned his head at the same time as he pulled from the tight heat that was still gripped around his over sensitive flesh.

He wasn't being mean. Tomo wasn't trying to be a jerk. He was trying to make it easy for them.

It was a moment of weakness brought on by too much to drink and a shared cab ride home.  
Yuh was supposed to get out on his own but he stumbled two steps towards his building, prompting Tomo to laugh and get out after him.

He'd told the driver to leave the meter running, that he was just going to see his friend upstairs safely and come back. But he never went back down again, never paid the driver that waited and honked until he was angry as fuck and certain that he'd been ditched.

What happened after Tomo had caught up with Yuh was simple enough. They laughed and talked without actually listening to each other, the way drunk people tend to. They had stumbled into the elevator, and Tomo made Yuh shriek by jumping up and down to make the small space quiver and shake.

They stumbled up the hall, both of their toes hitting a fold in the carpet near Yuh's door which sent them reeling into the wall. Yuh's back smacked into it roughly with Tomo landing against Yuh's front rather heavily.

They'd laughed for a moment, but it trailed off as they looked at each other.  
Now pressed together. Chest to chest, hip to hip... It seemed only natural for Tomo to lean in and catch the full pout of Yuh's mouth with his own.

It seemed only natural for Yuh to groan and grab at the sides of Tomo's shirt, tugging him in closer by the fabric.

Only natural for Tomo's hips to press forward into Yuh's, and just as natural for Yuh to press his own forward in return.

They'd stood there for close to half an hour, losing time in a drunken haze of kissing, grabbing, squeezing and sighing. Shifting and rubbing together in a cloud of ever heightening heat and desire.

"Come inside."

Yuh spoke the first and only words that would accompany what happened next. Stumbling into his apartment still trying to hold onto each other, tugging and ripping at clothing in a sudden frenzy that was in stark contrast to the way they had been acting in the hallway.

They had fumbled and tripped and generally made a mess of everything, drunk and bordering on desperate by now, there wasn't any emphasis on finesse or smooth performance. It was just about sating the need that had seemed to come from nowhere.

Tomo had done a terrible job of stretching Yuh first, forcing the man to arch and cry out painfully when he was first pushed into. But the good feelings outweighed the bad and even before Tomo could think to ask if he was okay (if it would have occurred to him at all) Yuh was grabbing at Tomo's hips, tugging at them as he pushed his hips upwards wanting more.

There was nothing romantic or even remotely sweet about what they did. Primal, sweaty, fucking in the pale blue sheets of Yuh's bed. It was dirty and needy accompanied by groans and gasps and cries but no words.

No names. Nothing personal seemed to be in this at all. Even as they came, together, bucking and writhing and grating their lungs with the harsh noises that forced their way out, there was nothing that was meshing them together past the obvious physical link.

So when Tomo said 'this never happened', it was to make it simple and easy. Sex happened, they were drunk and people did stupid things when they were drunk.

But as he shifted off the bed, moving around to gather his clothes, he missed the look of disappointment on Yuh's face.

Missed the hard swallow that pushed down the rising lump in the man's throat.

It wasn't like Yuh thought any of that was romantic. It wasn't in the least.

But it didn't mean that he wasn't shattered at the idea of Tomo wanting to ignore it...

But if that's what the vocalist wanted then-

"It never happened." Yuh said in a clear and almost sleepily bored voice that didn't betray what he was really thinking.

And it stung. Tomo paused in doing up his pants, reeling from hearing Yuh repeat what he'd just said to him.

It wasn't nothing. But Yuh was too scared to cause a fuss, and Tomo was just too scared. He left with a smirk, a wave, and a promise to call the next day to make sure Yuh's hangover was worse than his.

It happened. They both knew it did and neither of them would ever forget it.  
But would they ever be brave enough to say that to each other? That's another story.

—————————————————

(Meant to be a one shot that ended there I was asked for more and delivered two more chapters. :)

—————————————————

There were a lot of different ways Yuh and Tomo could have acted towards each other after having drunken, 'accidental' sex.

They could have been awkward. Blushing and shy and uncertain. Unable to look each other in the eye or even stay in close proximity to each other.

They could have actually moved on from it. Pretended things were the same as always for long enough that things really did become the same as they always were.

They could have been open about their feelings. Explored them and found out that neither of them really wanted that to be the first and only time they were together. That while it was an accident, it was a good one. One that showed them their true feelings.

So many good options were available to them. All of them cute and sweet and likely would have led to a very happy ending. But rather than keep things simple, Yuh and Tomo seemed to simultaneously take a completely different route to anything that's been noted here.

They fought. They turned on each other. No matter what the subject was, they disagreed and then argued, heatedly and at length, for opposing sides. It didn't matter if they were choosing what pizza toppings to get for everyone on a late night of work, or what songs to put on their set list for an upcoming show. They were violently against each other and whatever opinions they had.

It extended past letting them anywhere near each other as well. Even private conversations one would have with another band member were doomed to turn into nothing but a slandering mess if they brought up an opposing party.

More than once Tohya, Umi and Rui were left absolutely speechless at some nasty comment or pointedly cruel statement Yuh or Tomo said about each other. No explanation was offered, no reason was given. They'd turned into bitter hateful enemies overnight.

It affected work, it affected downtime. It affected everything but neither of them let on they knew that.

And neither of them let on how much they hated the things they said...

Because they didn't truly hate each other. Not one bit. They couldn't seem to stop the insults from flying or the arguments and protests. It was reflex reaction. Protection for emotion. Neither of them knew that the other wasn't okay with how things had been left. Both of them felt hurt and licking their wounds seemed to include hurling as many hurtful comments as possible at the one that hurt them.

"God, it's sickening, isn't it?" Tomo scoffed one day to Umi as they rested against the outside of their rehearsal building for a smoke. Umi was Tomo's favourite person to talk to lately. He was reserved and fairly quiet compared to the rest of them. He didn't try to join in on Tomo's Yuh bashing, nor did he protest against it. It made him the perfect one sided conversation partner.

"What is?" Umi asked, honestly not even realizing what he was leading into. He was actually thinking about Rui and the way the pretty bassist had looked trying to twist around and peer at his own ass earlier that day while he thought no one was looking.

"I mean who does he think he is? Stupid asshole. He looks terrible as a blonde. Completely wrong colour for him. Fucking.. horse face. It makes him look even blander than he really is. Huh.. at least it blends him into the background. You can sort of look through him."

Umi just looked at Tomo like he had two heads while the vocalist inhaled on his cigarette angrily. They'd come outside for a break after Yuh had called Tomo a 'fucking retard who was as about as useful as a hood ornament.' He should have known that agreeing to follow with Tomo would lead to the man talking about Yuh in an openly nasty way. But this was... bad. Even for Tomo.

And it wasn't just Umi that heard it. Yuh, who had slithered off on his own feeling sick from blurting out the things he did, had decided to go to his car and see if he still had a bottle of soda, wanting something fizzy to settle his stomach. But he'd stopped when he heard Tomo's voice and very clearly heard every opinion the vocalist had of him in that moment.

He could have stormed in and started shouting. Normally that would have been what Yuh's reaction course would have been, it was what was serving him best these days. But the careless way Tomo said what he did, like it was something that came naturally. Like these opinions were long established.  
It cut him right to the quick and he couldn't even get angry. Just hurt.

But he did get the hell out of there. He didn't even stay for the rest of practice. Everyone else regrouped but Yuh didn't surface again. Didn't pick up his cell when everyone but Tomo took a turn at calling him. And while everyone else just figured something had come up and shrugged it off.

Tomo worried about him.

He couldn't sleep that night, prowling around his apartment unable to concentrate on any task or distraction. Where had Yuh gone? Was he okay? Did something happen?

Tomo couldn't call him, his number would show up on Yuh's phone, the guitarist would know it was him. But he could just casually drive past his building. He wouldn't go in, of course, he'd just look and see if his lights were on.

The problem with this, Tomo found once he was at the building and parked across the street, was that he couldn't tell which window's were Yuh's. Drunk and stumbling didn't make for awareness and since Tomo had spent most of the elevator ride from the ground floor up scaring Yuh by jumping in the small car, he had no idea which floor he was on. And he certainly had no idea how many doors down he was to gauge where his windows may be.

As he sat there, his mind drifted. He thought about that night, how they'd stood in the hallway next to Yuh's door. How it felt to push against the other man who was surprisingly soft and warm. Who kissed better than anyone he'd ever been with, even while drunk. He thought about how Yuh had grabbed at his hips as he pushed into him, how they'd shifted and slid against those pale blue sheets... He couldn't get the colour of them out of his head. Something about it, about Yuh, about his bed and that night was scorched into his mind.

Tomo folded his arms over the steering wheel and rested his head down on top of them. All at once words started circling in his head, piecing themselves together in lines and frames. The patterning and mindless thought that came whenever Tomo got the beginnings of a new song.

He went home. There was no way that he'd be able to figure out what apartment Yuh's was, and he certainly couldn't sit there with nothing to write on when the creative block he'd recently been suffering finally seemed to be lifting.

***

"What's that?" Tohya asked, hopping a bit to try and peer over Tomo's hunched shoulder to see what he was writing.

"It's nothing." Tomo closed the notebook the moment he was aware of someone else around. It wasn't just Tohya, either. Umi was already there but he was across the room getting himself set up.

Tohya didn't even bother to protest or beg to see what Tomo was doing. He never gave in, anyways, so it wasn't worth his time. As he bounced across the room, the door opened not far away, dragging Tomo's eyes to who was coming in.

He didn't recognize him at first. Someone of a good height, lithe body and darkly cherry coloured hair.  
It wasn't until Tohya caught sight of him and crowed the man's name in surprise that Tomo saw it was Yuh.

The vocalist couldn't help but stare. His brain kept false starting with smart assed comments to make. The reflex to be mean still there, nipping and biting at him to to do something. But he couldn't. He just looked at him, eyes turning to follow Yuh as he walked past the table.

The guitarist looked like he was going to pass without saying anything, but at the last moment his head jerked around and dark eyes met Tomo's. "Doubt I'll be blending into your background haze of bland now, huh? Asshole."

Even if it didn't show in his face, and Tomo had the presence of mind to at least ensure that, his heart plummeted down somewhere around his ankles. Yuh had heard him talking to Umi. Yuh heard what he said about him. Heard him say he was horse faced and bland and that the only good thing about him being blonde was that it made him blend into the background.

That's why he'd left...

Rather than say anything, Tomo opened the notebook again and quickly scribbled down a few more lines;

i never thought you could have heard  
i didn't think you listened  
i don't want you to know  
the truth  
the lies i told  
to keep the peace, to keep us friends

"Okay." Tomo said after finishing the last word and flipping the book shut. "If everyone is done marvelling over the amazing miracle of food colouring on hair follicles can we get to work?"

But it didn't make him feel any better. Coming up with a snipe back at Yuh, acting like he was unmoved and uncaring. Tomo just felt worse. Sick, not knowing that Yuh had felt the same way the other day.

Something had to give. Something had to change.

***

What eventually changed was the patience of the rest of the band. It was getting more than bothersome and uncomfortable to be anywhere near Yuh and Tomo while they were in the same room. Whatever vendetta they had against each other was clearly personal and it was time for it to end. They were getting nothing accomplished at practices between Yuh complaining that Tomo was coming in late on his vocal parts and Tomo bitching that Yuh may have better luck playing the instrument that came with the 'Guitar Hero' game.

They were planning a tour, or at least trying to, and no one had managed to get anything done for it in the past three meetings and four rehearsals. Which led Umi to propose something to Rui and Tohya, who happily and easily accepted.

A fake practice was scheduled, Tomo and Yuh were notified and were to be the only ones in attendance. It was an old trick, but one that was simple, easy, and probably completely ineffective but they had to at least try. Their next option was dual lobotomies which was particularly pricey...

"Fuck.." The one word spoken from Tomo pretty much summed up exactly how Yuh felt as well when the vocalist came through the door of the rehearsal room. Tomo had been pointedly arriving late to every rehearsal so this wouldn't happen but apparently he wasn't late enough today.

Without an instrument to toy with, tune and re-tune to look busy the way Yuh did, he was left to slink to the table and stare broodily at his notebook without actually doing anything.

The minutes ticked by in silence. Ten.. then twenty... thirty turned into forty before Yuh shifted in his seat to pull his phone out and actually try and call Rui and see if he had the day wrong, regardless of Tomo being there too.

"Who're you calling?" Tomo muttered as he pulled his phone out, not wanting to call the same person as Yuh.

"Rui."

Tomo nodded and scrolled to find Umi's number instead, clicking to call and holding the phone to his ear. It rang once and rolled over to voicemail.

Inconclusive.

He tried Tohya next but it slipped right to voicemail without even ringing and Tomo glanced over at Yuh, who's eyes turned and met his. "Tohya?" Tomo said in question and then had to duck his head to hide the smile as Yuh nodded once.

They both tucked their phones away and fell back into silence again. Both of them were thinking the same thing, they'd been tricked. Fooled into coming here likely to try and work their problems out.  
And even though they both knew they'd been had, they were silently reluctant to leave.

Without other people around, the anger and resentment. The hurtful name calling and ill behaviour didn't seem to exist. All that was left was two people, feeling exactly the same thing, hurting exactly the same way but too scared to actually speak.

"Tohya said you're writing a new song."

It was Yuh that spoke first, even though everything in him screamed not to. It was easier to be mad. Angry. Hateful. Easier to avoid everything going on inside of him in hopes of balling it up and forcing it down. But an even bigger more dominant part of him was clawing at his insides begging to try and bridge the gap. To fix whatever this was because... even if he'd never had much of Tomo's time or attention, he was starting to realize how much he missed it.

And how much even that tiny little bit had meant to him.

"...yeah.." Tomo nodded a couple of times, turning in his seat even if he didn't move his eyes to meet Yuh's. He felt about an inch tall. Making Yuh speak first like that... for everything nasty Yuh had said to him or about him, Tomo's rebuttals were ten times as harsh. Calling him horse faced? Telling him to play a guitar with buttons instead of strings? All because he wasn't man enough to admit that he'd been wrong in the first place.

And now Yuh was speaking first.

"Think we got tricked." Tomo said. He didn't want to talk about the song. Yuh clearly thought it was neutral territory and Tomo could understand that completely. But the song was about him. About Yuh. About what happened.

"Yeah.." Yuh said the word softly, echoing what Tomo had replied with moments earlier. Parroting the word back the same way he had after Tomo said 'this never happened'.

"Yuh...?" Tomo's eyes finally raised, finally looked at the man across the room. "I thought you looked great blonde."

"Don't, Tomo..." Yuh's eyes dropped shortly after Tomo's finally connected with them. The first eye contact they'd made that wasn't glaring or accusing in weeks and Yuh broke it in seconds. "Just don't. I heard what you said."

"I didn't meant it!" Tomo said, shaking his head. "I was just.. angry."

"At what?" Yuh spat the words out, his hands tightening against the smooth sides of his guitar. He spoke without looking up, focusing so pointedly on the space of floor between his feet that he almost went cross eyed. "What did I do that made you so angry?!"

Yuh clearly wasn't just talking about that isolated incident. He was talking about how Tomo had been the first to snipe. He was the first to attack and the first to turn things mean. He never called Yuh the next day. He avoided the calls Yuh made to him and the first words out of his mouth when they finally met face to face at the next practice were 'fuck off, some people are serious about getting work done.'

"You said it never happened."

Fuck. Fuck. Had Tomo really said that? Had he actually voiced that out loud? The one thing he was trying to avoid at all costs?

"You said it never happened." Yuh's reply was accusatory. And with good reason.

"I thought... it would make things easier."

"Oh fuck you, Tomo!" The words cracked in the middle, Yuh's threshold had snapped and now the anger was giving way to obvious pain and emotion. "You didn't think about anything!"

That was... true, actually. Because it wasn't until Yuh had said the same words back to him that he realized they weren't right.

"I was wrong, okay?" Tomo said, but it came out biting and sharp. "I shouldn't have said it. I shouldn't even have gone into your apartment. I shouldn't have done ANYthing I did that night!"

Yuh winced, his head turning as streaks of tears fell from his eyes, squeezed out by shut lids. Just the sight of him, trying so hard to keep himself together as he fell apart made Tomo's heart ache.  
He hadn't meant it like that. He hadn't meant it to sound like Yuh was the mistake. He'd meant it to sound like he, himself, had done something wrong. That his actions were the problem, not Yuh's.

But it came out defensive. No.. more than that. He sounded like an asshole. A complete and total asshole of a player that didn't want any of the emotional responsibility that came with what they'd done.

"Yuh..." Tomo practically breathed the man's name as he looked at him with obvious concern.

"Don't, Tomo.." Yuh said, swallowing hard as he got up. He didn't even bother putting his guitar in it's case. He just picked it up and carried it along with the instrument as he headed for the door. "We just won't talk."

"No.. Yuh, I don't..."

"We never really talked before, did we?" Yuh said, turning his head as he paused in the doorway to look back at Tomo. "We weren't close. What happened doesn't have to change anything. For better or worse. We'll just go back to how things were before."

Now it was Tomo's turn to blindly agree to something that he didn't like. Yuh had done it, re-voicing Tomo's 'this never happened' while the words twisted in his chest. Tomo, now, mimicked back what Yuh had stated.

"We'll go back to how things were before..."

Just like the last time, neither of them liked it. Neither of them felt it was right. They both felt exactly the same way, both knew that nothing about this was as it should be.

But it hurt to much to even think about doing anything else.

——————————————

The truce, if one could call it that, only lasted a few weeks before the cracks that had appeared when leaving Yuh and Tomo alone deepened. They turned into craters and pitfalls that they both got lost in.

Tomo soldiered through it, trying to keep himself neutral and he stayed away from anything that could have been thought of as insulting to say. He thought he was being pleasant, but really what he was doing was ignoring Yuh completely. He didn't look at him or speak to him or come anywhere near him.

Yuh dealt with things a different way. He started missing practices. Just a couple at first. But then he stopped coming altogether. He didn't show, didn't call to say he wasn't coming, and he never picked up if anyone called him during practice time.

They all worried. Everyone but Tomo worried openly about whether or not he was okay, all while shifting darting glances at the vocalist since they knew he had something to do with it. Tomo worried the most, though he did it silently.

It wasn't until there was a knock on his door late one night that things actually seemed to come to a head on his end. His visitor was Umi, the quietest but definitely the most well informed of the band members. Umi tended to be calm and collected at all times, but when Tomo opened the door he saw a completely different Umi than normal. This Umi looked worried and almost a little bit scared.

"What's wrong with you?" Tomo asked blithely, but already he was worried it had something to do with Yuh.

"What happened with you and Yuh?" Umi asked, the words coming out forcefully as he stepped into Tomo's apartment. He looked at the other man almost accusingly as he spoke. "What's going on with you guys?"

"Nothing." That was a stock response. It wasn't the first time Tomo had been asked and he always answered in a lie. "Why?"

"Because I just got off the phone with Rui who went out with him today. Yuh's thinking about leaving the band, Tomo. He's going to leave. And I don't know what happened with you guys but I'm pretty damn sure his decision is based on that."

Tomo didn't react. Not because he didn't care but because it seemed completely impossible. Yuh wouldn't leave, would he?

"He's just being over dramatic." Tomo said, but it came out weakly and one of his hands pushed out to rest against the wall, holding himself up. "He's not going to quit, he just wants attention."

"What's wrong with you?" Umi said, looking at his friend and band member as though he'd just grown donkey ears or something similar. "Do you honestly think that he'd joke about something like that?"

"......Yeah..?" Tomo couldn't help it sounding like a question, a hopeful one that he wanted Umi to agree with him about.

"This is your fault." Umi said instead. "I don't know what happened with you guys, I don't know what throwing you into the same room together did, but it broke Yuh. You came out of it fine, clearly, he seemed to get a little smaller every day you spent ignoring him. This is your fault."

Of course it was his fault. Tomo had thought that right from the start, all of this was his fault. He knew it. But he never thought it would lead to something like this. To Yuh feeling he had to leave the band because of his presence there. And that's what it was, right? Yuh was leaving to stay away from him.

"He's not leaving." Tomo said, raising his eyes to meet Umi's. "He's not."

"Yes he is. He's not joking." Umi took what Tomo said as a brush off. That the vocalist didn't believe Yuh would leave. But what Tomo really meant was that Yuh wasn't leaving because Tomo wouldn't let him.

Being alone with him that day the fake practice was scheduled didn't produce the resolution either of them were looking for. But while Tomo had continuously tried to think of anything he could do to fix things, he'd made it seem like he didn't care at all. It made Yuh shrink further and further into himself. It made the guitarist feel like dirt. That Tomo was just fine, coping with everything as though it didn't matter while he was left defenceless.

Tomo saw it happening. He wasn't completely unaware of Yuh's presence seeming to diminish little by little over the past few weeks. But he thought maybe they were coping in different ways. That Yuh turned inward to deal with things while he, himself, projected outward.

He'd been wrong. Tomo had been really fucking wrong and now Yuh felt like the only thing left for him to do was to leave entirely? Tomo didn't even know what the other man must be feeling. What he must have been going through just because....

"I'm such a chickenshit.." Tomo said quietly, realizing then that all of this could have been solved if he hadn't been afraid. If he'd taken a chance, if he'd trusted Yuh. If he'd swallowed his pride and admitted what he really wanted. At least then he would have been honest, even if Yuh didn't feel the same way. All of this mess... it could have been avoided.

"What?" Umi's forehead creased as he looked at Tomo in question. He didn't understand how that was relevant in the least.

"I gotta go." Tomo said, almost deadly calm as he grabbed his keys and hopped around to pull his shoes on. "I have to go, let yourself out when you're ready to leave. I just.. I gotta do something.."

Umi, of course, had no idea what Tomo was doing. He had two thoughts about it as he watched Tomo dash out of the apartment, leaving him still standing in the small entryway. The first was that the vocalist was trying to get away from a crappy situation without dealing with it. That seemed the most possible at this point. The second was that Tomo might actually be going to try and fix things.

But he doubted it.

Umi was wrong, though. All Tomo could think about was trying to make this better any way he knew how. Realizing that all this was because he'd been too scared to deal with what happened and actually talk about it... Ego no longer played a part. He'd hurt Yuh, clearly. He'd forced him to agree to something the guitarist clearly didn't want. Yuh was too soft to challenge what Tomo suggested, the vocalist knew that. There was no way that he would have argued with him when Tomo decided they should just pretend it never happened. He was considering Tomo's feelings... while Tomo was thinking of no one but himself.

It was pouring rain, absolutely dumping buckets down from clouds that seemed intent on lingering over the city without moving. Tomo didn't even think about it as he parked across the road from Yuh's building and dashed across the busy street towards the front doors. They were, of course, locked. Barring entrance to anyone who didn't live in the building, with a call box just off to one side.

Tomo ran his finger down the list of names, but with the water pouring from his hair into his eyes and rushing down the call box itself he couldn't make out any of the listed tenants. Refusing to be deterred, Tomo took his phone out and walked out to the edge of the sidewalk, looking up while he dialled Yuh's number.

"Please pick up.." Tomo said, blinking in the onslaught of water as he tried in vain to see Yuh through any of the windows. "Please please.. please.."

"Tomo?"

Tomo almost laughed when his call was answered and Yuh's voice said his name. "Let me in!" He yelled, needing to above the rushing water that was trying to take over the call. "For the love of god let me in your building!"

"What?" Yuh was confused.. he was surprised enough by the call but what Tomo said.. it just all seemed in complete contrast to everything that had happened in the past weeks.

"Yuh, PLEASE!" Tomo cried, actually nearing tears at this point he was so desperate. "I'm outside, let me in! Tell me what floor you're on, please let me in, please..."

"I'm...." His mind was reeling. Yuh was shocked to say the least, acting on reflex without thinking about it as he went over to his door. "Seventh floor..." He said and pressed the button to open the front door.

He didn't hear much else, the splash of water and clatter of the door being wrenched open before the line went dead. He just stood there for a minute holding his phone and listening to static before he turned, almost hesitantly and opened his apartment door to step out into the hall.

Tomo on the other hand was a man on a mission. There was no question in his mind about what he wanted to do or where he was going. Oblivious to the thick trail of water he left behind, the moment the door was opened he dashed through the lobby to the elevator. The ride to the seventh floor has seemed so short the first time he'd done it, drunk and giggling. But now, shivering and dripping on the carpet, it seemed to take forever.

He looked the wrong way first, peering up the hall in the opposite direction of where Yuh was standing just outside his door, but when he looked back, turning the right way it only took him a moment to react. He moved up the hall walking, but doing it very quickly and very pointedly. He didn't stop in front of Yuh, he barrelled right into him.

Arm curled around him, Tomo's head pressed right in against his chest, hugging him the way a small child would hug a parent. Trying to curl up into and against him as much as possible as his breath hitched and eyes ached with unshed tears.

"You can't leave." Tomo said quietly, swallowing hard against the lump in his throat. "You can't leave, Yuh..."

"Tomo you're soaked... You're going to get sick.."

"Doesn't matter. Doesn't matter." Tomo murmured, pressing harder against the other man, clutching at him tighter and tighter. "Don't leave.. It's all my fault. Everything. I said the wrong thing and.. I knew it was wrong even before I left your place and I didn't correct it. I didn't say anything, I thought you agreed with me. I was too scared to say I changed my mind. All of this is my fault. Don't leave, Yuh.. I need you."

"Tomo.." Yuh's arms moved to curl around the man pressed against him. He was already soaked down his front, it didn't matter if his sleeves got wet, too. "Tomo it was my fault, too. I didn't have to agree with you."

Tomo raised his head then, bringing his face level with Yuh's so he could see him. "None of this is your fault. None of it... I started it, I started everything. I told you to pretend we never hooked up. I started saying nasty things to you..."

"But you tried to talk to me a few weeks ago. I was the one who said we should just go back to the way things were." Yuh brought one hand up to sift through Tomo's saturated and matted hair, pushing it away from his face. "I thought it would make things easier."

"I thought pretending it never happened would make things easier." Tomo said, his head tilting towards Yuh's hand. "But when you said it back to me it hurt. And I knew it wasn't the right thing to do but.."

"But you thought I agreed with you and going back on what you said would make things worse. Tomo... I understand now."

Tomo's face softened into a small almost hopeful smile. "Don't leave the band." He whispered softly.

Yuh shook his head a bit and looked down. "I don't know if we can work together after all this. Nothing's ever going to be the same."

"Then we won't even try to make it the same."

Tomo said the words softly and in a bit of a rush as he leaned in, bringing his lips in against Yuh's softly. It was a gamble and a risk. Just because he, himself, had realized his mistake and knew that what he should have done was admit he wanted more of what they'd shared, he didn't know if Yuh felt the same way. He didn't know if Yuh was just upset over the whole thing because it was nerve wearing, or if he maybe... maybe... felt the same.

But after realizing that all of this happened because he was too scared to do anything, Tomo was ready to take a chance.

Yuh wasn't far behind. The moment Tomo leaned in, the moment the vocalist's lips touched his own Yuh felt a rush of heat that sizzled through him from head to foot. He remembered it from last time, only now he wasn't suffering the effects of too much alcohol at the same time. A very quiet noise left him, his heart thumped a little too hard in his chest, and he tilted his head, leaning into Tomo and returning the kiss just as warmly and softly as it was being offered to him.

This time it was different. This time when they found themselves together in the blue sheets of Yuh's bed, there wasn't any of the desperate needy grabbing that fuelled them before. They didn't just rip each others clothes off, there wasn't any rush to sate themselves.

They'd stripped still standing up, a process that moved at a snail's pace as each piece of clothing removed encouraged touching and kissing. Skin was mapped out by palms and lips, memorized and felt out completely before moving on to whatever came next.

Even once they were in the bed there was no rush. Nothing was hurried and everything flowed as though this was the millionth time they'd been together, not the second.

Tomo had pulled the sheet up over them, cloaking them in a tiny cool tinted world that was made up of only the two of them. He kissed the man under him as he touched him, pressed fingers against Yuh's entrance to open him properly this time. Not wanting to hurt him and force into him the way he had before. After thought had led him to the realization that he'd done a terrible job the first time. He wanted to make it up to Yuh now.

His mouth was against the butterfly on the side of Yuh's neck when Tomo finally pushed into his body to bring them together properly. Yuh arched under him, pushing to meet him with a soft noise. Not in pain this time, not even needing the few seconds he did last time to feel the benefit of having Tomo buried in his body. This time it was there from the start.

Tomo's mouth slid away from Yuh's neck, opting instead to press soft, intermittent kisses to the pretty man's mouth as they sifted and arched and pressed together in smooth motions that seemed mapped in heart beats and sighs.

They came together, as they did the first time, but now as they gasped and pulled tighter to each other, eyes met even if it was just for the briefest moment before closing out of necessity as the rush of feeling overtook them. Just that one moment of connection made all the difference. They weren't two separate people in that bed, they were two people wrapped and coiled together.

This was how it was supposed to be.

***

"The song was about you." Tomo said. They were still curled up in bed, Tomo half propped up on pillows with Yuh splayed over his chest. The pretty man's red hair feathered a bit when Tomo breathed out they were cuddled so close together.

"Mm?" Yuh's head shifted a bit, turning just enough that he could see Tomo while they talked. "About me?"

"Well... about us. About what happened. I never really intended anyone to see it but.. you can if you want."

Yuh smiled, one arm stretching a little more over Tomo's torso to squeeze him gently as he nodded once. "I'd like that. I wondered what you were writing that you weren't sharing. Normally you like input."

"Normally yes.. but this was a little more personal. I only want to share it with you."

They fell into comfortable silence again, Yuh's cheek nuzzled down against Tomo's chest, but now the vocalist could see his face and watch him quietly.

After what seemed an eternity, Tomo broke the silence to speak.

"Yuh..?"

"Hm?"

Tomo paused for a moment, then smiled before whispering softly;

"This did happen..."


End file.
